Chime In How Surviving a Brain Tumor Made Me Rethink My Drive to Achieve Stories You May Like Big (Red) Love: A Celebration of Cornellian Couples ‘That’s When It Clicked’: Alums Share their Big Red ‘Aha’ Moments A Weill Cornell Medicine Doc on Aiding COVID-Era Back Pain From Cornell to my consulting career, I was determined to be the hardest worker—until a severe health crisis intervened “Chime In” comprises brief first-person essays by Cornellians. Do you have a topic in mind? Email us at cornellians@cornell.edu! By Michelle Shin ’19 When people ask me what I do for work, I tell them I’m unemployed. “I’m sorry to hear that," they often say. "Were you laid off or fired by your employer, like many of us these days?” “No," I tell them. "I’ve been unemployed for almost a year now, due to personal medical challenges.” My responses tend to puzzle the questioner and lead to an awkward silence. On the exterior, I appear to be a capable and confident young professional. But the truth is that I face significant physical and mental health challenges that are not reflected in how I currently appear and talk. I am an individual who lives with a rare form of brain tumor and has undergone innumerous challenges that not only affect my physical balance, but also spur a constant internal battle regarding “productivity.” In 2019, I graduated from Cornell with achievements that reflected my strong work ethic and motivation. Immediately afterward, I relocated to Washington, DC, and joined a mission-driven consulting firm that focused on advancing outcomes-driven environmental finance. I am an individual who lives with a rare form of brain tumor and has undergone innumerous challenges that not only affect my physical balance, but also spur a constant internal battle regarding 'productivity.' The Cornellian in me strived to be an overachieving, “perfect” employee by working nights and weekends. These long hours paid off with not only a quick promotion but also high regard from the C-suite executives. But this wasn’t enough. I kept striving for bigger and better—soon joining top-tier consulting companies and earning respect, admiration, and trust from leaders and clients alike. On East Hill's Flat Rock Bridge. My 80-hour workweeks allowed me to feel incredibly productive and successful, and I was proud to be a treasured employee. Little did they all know that I was running off of complete burnout—and a rare form of brain tumor. In fact, I live with a tumor so rare that I have been told by my neuro-oncologist teams at Johns Hopkins and the National Institutes of Health that I am an international sample size of one. While one could think that this designation would affirm my achievements, I found myself defaulting to the thought of being better—of being the “perfect” sample size of one. It wasn’t until last year, when I was undergoing experimental chemotherapy (while, of course, still working hard), that I was forced to slow down and truly reflect on my definition of productivity. Last year, I had a brain hemorrhage so traumatic that the roots of my hair turned completely white and I lost all of my motor skills. Not being able to speak, walk, or write frustrated the strategic go-getter in me. And amidst this medical chaos, I coincidentally lost my job, which resulted in significant financial strain. It wasn’t until last year, when I was undergoing experimental chemotherapy, that I was forced to slow down. Stories You May Like Big (Red) Love: A Celebration of Cornellian Couples ‘That’s When It Clicked’: Alums Share their Big Red ‘Aha’ Moments Not only did I have a new status as an individual with disabilities—stripped of even the most basic form of communication—but I was unable to maintain or look for employment. Against all odds, I am still here—talking, thinking, and moving. If my productive pursuits came at the cost of my own self, I had to reconstruct my own understanding of productivity. As part of my recovery process, I am learning how to redefine the concept of productivity from optimized work output to better management of time and energy that prioritizes my own wellbeing and happiness. During Commencement Weekend. This process has led me to reflect on Cornell's founding principle of "... any person ... any study." I am rewiring my brain to accept that I can and should "study" my emotions and myself as a person. Because only I know the full weight of me—all of me. So I have committed myself to pursuing a life of full self-expression through the performing arts—attending dance, acting, and improv classes or performances—which are in complete contrast to my consulting background. I have committed myself to pursuing a life of full self-expression through the performing arts, which are in complete contrast to my consulting background. I have never intentionally tapped into my creativity before, so being a complete novice in every room has resulted in self-doubt and self-criticism. But I take a deep breath and remind myself that it is truly a miracle to even show up. That reconstructing my decades-long meaning of productivity is, of course, not a smooth journey. Performing with the Washington Improv Theater. I am repeatedly challenged to accept and embrace my imperfections—ones that are part of just being one human being in this world. I know there is still a lot waiting for me, and I will always be a lifelong learner as I continue to pursue my creative journey. Looking back, I wish I could tell my undergrad self that it’s OK to not be the best, the most unique, the most (insert your insecurity) all the time. I wish I could tell her that it’s OK to prioritize yourself and realize that everyone’s journey is unique—and that one’s definition of productivity can evolve, both during and after Cornell. Michelle Shin ’19 grew up between Milwaukee, WI, and South Korea. She majored in interdisciplinary studies in CALS, with minors in gerontology and in law and society. As a student, she often walked and biked through Tompkins County and meditated in the Botanic Gardens. (All images provided.) Published September 15, 2025 Comments Aimen 15 Sep, 2025 What a beautiful inspiring piece! My heart really warmed up reading the growth and journey Michelle had endured- Evolution and change is and can be very daunting no matter the circumstances Reply Abby 15 Sep, 2025 This is an uplifting story speaking to the will one has to succeed. Michelle shows that success is defined according to what you’re attempting to achieve, not the stereotypical ideas most people assign to it. Self-acceptance and perseverance are so important when overcoming the adversity you’re facing. What was poignant was that when it was revealed that Michelle was a sample of one, she took that news as an opportunity to excel in life in her own way being the best sample of one she could. Many people have a strong work ethic but it’s often dismissed when it’s threatened by tough circumstances. Despite her circumstances, Michelle rose to the occasion working twice as hard to enjoy the life she’s grateful to have. Michelle is an inspiration and I applaud her! Reply Rosie M. Batista, Class of 1998 14 Oct, 2025 Michelle Thank you for reminding all of us over achiever that we are more than the sum of our academic and work achievements. At any point our lives can shift. May we kindly support those with all disabilities. We need to accept ALL humans have value despite our capitalist society telling all of us work outputs are the most important thing in life. Beautiful life story. Reply Leave a Comment Cancel replyOnce your comment is approved, your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *Comment * Name * Class Year Email * Save my name, email, and class year in this browser for the next time I comment. Δ Other stories You may like Bear Hugs Looking Sharp: CALS Grad Collects Vintage Cornell Pins (and Jewelry) Quizzes & Puzzles How Much Do You Know about Big Red Laureates? Cornelliana Prolific Campus Architect Couldn’t Wait for a Department—Or a Degree