{"id":49502,"date":"2025-03-28T14:44:25","date_gmt":"2025-03-28T18:44:25","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/alumni.cornell.edu\/cornellians\/?p=49502"},"modified":"2025-03-28T14:44:26","modified_gmt":"2025-03-28T18:44:26","slug":"hoffman-teens-digital","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/alumni.cornell.edu\/cornellians\/hoffman-teens-digital\/","title":{"rendered":"Tips on Safeguarding Teens\u2019 Mental Health in the Digital Age"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

A psychology professor weighs in on why it\u2019s important to talk to your kids about their online lives, among other advice<\/p>\n\n\n\n

By Beth Saulnier<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Adolescence has never been easy\u2014but for the current cohort of post-pandemic teens growing up in the digital age, it\u2019s arguably more fraught than ever. <\/em>Cornellians tapped <\/em>Adam Hoffman<\/em><\/a>, an assistant professor of psychology who\u2019s an expert on adolescent development, for some words of wisdom.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Hoffman, who\u2019s based in Human Ecology and has an appointment in Arts & Sciences, also runs the <\/em>PRIDE Lab<\/em><\/a>, which does community-based research on youth who are LGBTQ+, come from marginalized racial groups, or intersect with both identities.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

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How stressful a world is this for today\u2019s youth, compared to recent generations?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

We\u2019re definitely in a more challenging time than we\u2019ve ever been in, in terms of what our teenagers have to cope with\u2014and that\u2019s mostly coming from the social media landscape that\u2019s been added in the past decade. There\u2019s a ubiquity now that that wasn\u2019t there even 10 years ago.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

These kids are managing a whole new part of themselves. Identity exploration is totally developmentally appropriate, but this is absolutely another thing that they have to deal with. We see this reflected in the state of teenage mental health: there are higher levels of anxiety, depression, and loneliness. <\/p>\n<\/div>

\"Prof.<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

The CDC shows that over 40% of high school students report persistent feelings of sadness or loneliness, which is a pretty big jump from a decade ago.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Is it safe to assume the pandemic played a role?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Yes, there have been lingering effects. It disrupted teens\u2019 normative development, especially socially. Some of them haven\u2019t been taught the skills they need, leaving them feeling like they can\u2019t regain solid footing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Are today\u2019s parents at something of a disadvantage because they didn\u2019t grow up with these technologies themselves?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

The prior generation is always going to be trying to keep up. It\u2019s an eternal issue, and it will become more profound, because of how quickly technology advances.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n

We\u2019re definitely in a more challenging time than we\u2019ve ever been in, in terms of what our teenagers have to cope with.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

You mentioned loneliness has risen, which seems strange now that we\u2019re connected online in ways we never were before. Why are teens more lonely, rather than less?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Because they\u2019re not necessarily connecting in ways that enhance feelings of togetherness. Digital connections are easy, and that\u2019s great\u2014but they don\u2019t replace being together in person.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The loss of \u201cthird spaces,\u201d like coffee shops and other meeting spots, has made it increasingly harder for us to get together. Then throw in the pandemic effects of people isolating themselves\u2014getting back into the rhythm hasn\u2019t been easy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Why are these \u201cthird spaces\u201d so important?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

They\u2019re woven into everyday life. They\u2019re neutral ground, and typically low stakes. You can come and go quickly; you can meet up with friends or start conversations with strangers.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Good examples are coffee shops, malls, and parks. But we know these places are shrinking. Malls are slowly dying. Here in the U.S., coffee shops are becoming more about to-go orders, and not necessarily spaces where people can sit down, relax, and enjoy themselves.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n

Digital connections are easy, and that\u2019s great\u2014but they don\u2019t replace being together in person.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

The decline of these kinds of physical spaces has been really hard on our teens\u2014not to have organic places to hang out like prior generations had. Think about the drive-in or the local hot dog stand. They\u2019re not there anymore, or they\u2019re slowly going away. It\u2019s easy to turn to digital spots to fill social needs, but it\u2019s really not the same.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A lot of us older folks can\u2019t imagine having to navigate adolescence in the social media age. What are some of those special pressures?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Once something is on the Internet, it lives there\u2014and that\u2019s scary. Teenagers have to contend with developing an identity and a \u201cbrand\u201d through their social media\u2014something we never had to do before.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In the past, you could easily become one thing and then try something else; in adolescence, that\u2019s what you\u2019re supposed to do. It\u2019s a time of identity exploration and figuring out who you are.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Now, you have to be like, \u201cOkay, I\u2019m the goth kid.\u201d Once that\u2019s how you portray yourself, it\u2019s hard to flip it and explore a new identity.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What about the effects of social media algorithms on developing minds?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

We know that these platforms are designed to be addictive\u2014the endless scrolling, likes, and notifications. This really does hijack attention; it\u2019s an important cognitive skill, and we know that in teens, it\u2019s suffering. We also see disruptions in sleep, which is critical for adolescent brain development, even into our 20s.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n

Teenagers have to contend with developing an identity and a ‘brand’ through their social media\u2014something we never had to do before.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

I don\u2019t want to demonize social media. It\u2019s a tool. And like any other, you can use it for good and bad. It can connect teens to their peers and to resources, but it can also expose them to unrealistic standards, cyberbullying, and constant comparisons with others.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What recommendations do you have for how parents can moderate these negative impacts?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

We need to have an open dialogue with our teens and encourage them to talk about what\u2019s going on in their lives\u2014especially their digital lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Oftentimes, when we ask kids, \u201cHow was your day? What did you do?\u201d we\u2019re thinking about the \u201creal world.\u201d But also inquire about what\u2019s going on in the digital world. Ask questions like, \u201cWhat\u2019s the best thing you saw online today?\u201d Keep it light and easy, so they know they can talk to you about it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Also, set boundaries. Work collaboratively with your teen to create screentime limits and rules like no phones in bedrooms or no devices after 10 p.m. Talk to them about how it\u2019s about sleep, not about controlling them. Involve them in that decision. They\u2019re teenagers; they need to start having these collaborative conversations.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n

Ask questions like, ‘What\u2019s the best thing you saw online today?’ Keep it light and easy, so they know they can talk to you about it.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

We also need to boost offline life. Push for things like extracurriculars, nature time, or family rituals. Build their identity and connections beyond their screens.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And finally: watch for red flags like persistent withdrawal, issues with sleep, and irritability that\u2019s more than typical teen moodiness. Parents should trust their gut and seek professional help if needed\u2014and normalize it as a strength, not a failure.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Nowadays, moms and dads can text their kids 24\/7. We know the stereotype of the \u201chelicopter parent\u201d\u2014but beyond the obvious safety advantages, is there an upside?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

In some ways, it can facilitate communication, especially on topics that maybe kiddos don\u2019t want to talk about in person. Sometimes messaging can make tough conversations easier.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What about the fact that parents can track their child\u2019s location?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Again, it\u2019s all about how we\u2019re using it. It can be a helpful tool, or it can be problematic. It can feel like a restriction of freedom\u2014but it can keep kids from doing things they shouldn\u2019t, because \u201cI know my mom\u2019s watching, and she knows where I am.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It gives parents peace of mind. But at the same time, you have to let go of your kids eventually, and let them fully live their lives. You\u2019re not going to track them forever.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n

You have to let go of your kids eventually, and let them fully live their lives. You\u2019re not going to track them forever.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

How might social media be particularly important for members of marginalized groups, like LGBTQ+ youth?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

For them, it\u2019s huge. Think about the gay boy growing up in rural Wyoming, and being able to talk with other LGBTQ+ people, learn about their community, and develop \u201cchosen family.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Or take the example of a child adopted from Asia, growing up in a predominantly white area. Social media can connect them with other Asian people, if they\u2019d like to.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

We\u2019ve all heard horror stories about how algorithms can fuel negative behaviors; how do you ensure your teens\u2019 social media isn\u2019t promoting things like violence, disordered eating, or self-harm?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

You don\u2019t necessarily need to monitor everything they\u2019re looking at, unless you have a reason for concern.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Again, it\u2019s important to foster conversations from the beginning\u2014asking them what\u2019s going on in their online lives. What have they been searching for, looking at, thinking about? What did they learn today online?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Those kinds of questions can give you a temperature check on their digital lives. Making your kids feel safe about talking to you is the best way to know what\u2019s going on in their digital worlds.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(Top: Illustration by Ashley Osburn \/ Cornell University. Hoffman photo provided.)<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Published March 28, 2025<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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